The Popular Front for the Liberation of the C.P.S.A
CONFERENCE
1981
MONDAY
FREE GIFT
Good Morning, delegates to yet another faction bloodbath in Brighton.
With this first PFLCPSA Conference Communiqué you will receive
a completely free Polish flag to keep for your very own; the PFLCPSA theme
for this year's Conference is Poland (see over for more details) and delegates
will be expected to wave their free Polish flags at the following times:
a) to call for reference back, b) to call for tellers or a card vote,
c) whenever the President speaks, particularly to announce an election
result, d) during the Polish debates later in the week and e) whenever
Ray Alderson is sober.
Delegates will know that the long awaited Presidential election is to
be announced this morning. Right-minded citizens will of course realise
that Mrs. Losinska has been re-elected for a third term of office by a
massive majority. However, mischievous elements have been spreading the
following lies: the ever popular Len Julius Caesar Lever has
in fact won the presidential election by a narrow margin, but the wicked
time-servers of the Daylies group are pulling out all the
stops to have the election nullified. Some have dared to suggest that
the whole election will be fixed to pre-empt Caesar taking the throne,
others suggest that Mrs. Losinska's bellboy Charlie Elliott has been given
the task of ensuring that all goes smoothly.
To this end he has been complaining that Pat Hannaford, the CPSA HQ Office
Manager, sent out the Election' Addresses before we were ready",
and that in the event of an unfavourable result all the spoilt ballot
papers will be called in with a view to nullifying the results The possible
legal ramifications of all this maneuvering may help to explain the unusual
presence in the Observers Gallery of Ben Hooberman, Mrs. L's personal
solicitor and influential senior partner in the respected legal firm Lawfords.
Advisers to Frank Chapple and Mrs. Losinska during tie 1976 case in which
she took the CPSA to court, he can of course be relied upon to see that
everything goes all right.
We are pleased to note that Mrs. L in pursuance of branch democracy has
written to a number of branches dominated by Reds and their fellow travellers.
She has pointed out that the oft-practiced custom of making a Branch Committee
recommendations to the branch on which NEC candidate is to be supported
or opposed is quite despicable and the antithesis of democracy, We are
surprised that one branch, understood to be controlled by a dissident
element of her own faction, the Daylies group, dared to write
tack to Mrs. L protesting, and stating that they would be continuing this
practice. We trust that Mr Hooberman will be contacting them soon.
POLISH UP YOUR POLISH
With renewed interest in affairs Polish both internationally and within
the union, it was only natural that that the PFLCPSA should declare this
Conference a Polish special. So each day the PFLCPSA Communiqué
will contain an item of distinctly Polish flavour, ranging from useful
phrases to Polish recipes, jokes and historical background. Today, we
begin with a few Polish phrases that may be useful during Conference and
the evening socialising, and we urge you to use them during debate:
DZlEN DOBRY CONFERENTZYA
Good morning Conference
DZIEN DOBRY PANI PRESYDENTYA
Good Morning Madam president
TUTAJ SA DOLAROW PAN ELLIS
Here are your dollars Mr. Ellis
GDZIE JEST RAY ALDERSON?
Where is Ray Alderson?
ON JEST POD STOLEM!
He is under the table!
CZY CHCIALBY PAN NA DANCING?
Will you have this dance?
NIE, PROSZE MNIE ZOSTAMIE W SPOKOJU!
No, leave me alone!
MESSAGE TO PFLCPSA SUPPORTERS:
Apologies to PFLCPSA supporters over the mix-up in venues for the PFLCPSA
Rally on Saturday night, which led to numbers of you wandering the streets
looking for a non-existent pub. However, there will be a PFLPCSA meeting
this evening (and each Evening) immediately after the close of today's
business in the Tea Bar, All PFLCPSA CADRES should attend.
WHO ARE THE PFLCPSA?
Some new delegates may not have heard of the Popular Front for the Liberation
of the CPSA before attending this conference and seeing our daily communiqués.
The PFLCPSA was set up some years ago as an alliance of organisations
who had agreed to fight on a common programme of action in the union.
The largest organisation within the PFLCPSA is the Islamic Left and we
support their aim of the twin path to the Most Holy God Allah through
faithful prayer and the Jihad, or popular uprising of the masses.
The PFLCPSA support the following demands:
Support for the Islamic Left Annual Conference to be held in Beirut.
For the abolition of all forms of balloting and their replacement by the
Popular Will of the Masses
End the stranglehold of the Catholic Action Group
For the abolition of the National Executive Committee and its replacement
by a Revolutionary Command Council.
The CPSA is currently riddled by numerous boring factions and the PFLCSSA
will fight unstintingly to expose their maneuvering and wheeler dealing
through which they attempt to maintain their evil grasp over you, the
ordinary member.
QUIZ TIME
Why is Jenny Fosdal, doyenne of the Royal Albion bar, known as "Martini"
Nothing to do with her drinking habits. It refers instead to the TV advert,
which has the jingle as follows, Anytime, Anyplace, Anywhere.
Gedditt ??!!
CREEP OF THE DAY
This coveted award today goes to the sententious beer swilling armchair
socialist in charge of Civil Service Standing Orders, Roy Lewis.
TUESDAY
WHAT KATIE
DIDN'T
There is no substance whatever to the wicked rumours that have been circulating
as follows:
Mrs.LOSINSKA has not announced the Presidential results and other results
today because yesterday she was unable to contact her solicitor, Mr. Hooberman
(the Electricians Friend) in case there has been a miscarriage
of justice and the result is not all right.
As reported yesterday it has been confirmed that Julius Caesar Lever has
won the presidential race. Although it is not yet confirmed, and despite
vicious RED rumours, it is clear that the much respected Moderates have
won an overwhelming majority on the incoming NEC. Mrs. L's chief toady
and press lackey is wrong (as always) to predict a 28 - 0 right majority.
As is Caledonian Drone Stuart MacLennan who is optimistically boasting
of an 18 - 10 swing to the left. Garden gnome look-alike Frank Taylor
is of course correct (as always) with his prediction of 22 - 6 to the
right, but to the horror of failed gravy-trainers who do not feature on
the list of successful candidates i.e. George Lobo and Frank Bonner.
In the Section Elections, the Daylies stooges have not been doing too
well. This is the reason that the returning Officer Stuart Crowhurst has
called in all the Section ballot papers with a view to exposing the electoral
frauds of the despised Broad Left, who are aiming to have swept the board
in all sections, displacing all but three of the Twilight
group in both DE and DHSS. In MOD however, where democracy and justice
prevail, the left have miserably failed in all but the Section Scrutineers
election.
The following acts by current members of the NEC have been noted: IRENE
DEVENISH so disliked the comments made about her in DE Section Conference
by well-known Trotskyite Frank Sullivan that she demanded transcripts
of the speech with a view to showing them to her solicitor and prosecuting
for slander.
SYLVIA PARRY appeared somewhat tired and emotional at the MOD social on
Sunday. Approaching a group of the MOD Terrorists faction
who were minding their own business, she was heard to invite them to fuck
off.
JOHN BARR of DNS Glasgow was allocated 6 motions to speak on at Conference.
He approached John Ellis with a view to getting BRUNO to write 6 speeches
for him, but was told to write them himself, he then wrote to the GS saying
that he would be unable to attend Conference as the emotional strain would
be too great. He is not at Conference claiming "ill-health"
but he was at work last Friday, as usual.
LLOYD GEORGE HOLAN, outgoing Senior VP, when elected last
year, surveyed the spacious lawn behind the Nightingale Lane HQ, He then
rang up the office manager to order a suite of patio furniture and the
conversion of the lawn into a putting green. These requests were refused.
And at COCSU London No.1 Committee he told the astonished delegates last
month that he was going on holiday for a month, as this was the
only spare time I could get. In the middle of the pay campaign,
George?
MARTIN GRIMSHAW at a previous CPSA Conference in Brighton was enterprising
enough to take a day off for a day trip to France. We don't know what
he said to the Branch at his report back. The PFLCPSA submitted an emergency
motion calling an immediate blockade of ports and airports.
POLISH DUMPLINGS (Pierogi)
Ingredients: 150g buckwheat groats (kasha) /5O g butter or fat/ 1 medium-sized
onion, finely chopped/ 50g mushrooms, sliced/ salt and fresh ground black
pepper, for the dough-400g flour/ 1 medium sized egg/ pinch of salt.
Filling: spread buckwheat in dry non-stick frying pan and place over a
low heat. When strong buckwheat smell is apparent, gently stir for 10
mins to brown evenly. Stir in 225mls water and simmer gently for 15 mins,
stir occasionally to fluff up grains. In another frying pan melt butter
or fat over low heat and sauté onions and mushrooms until onion
is transparent but not browned. Add these with butter or fat to buckwheat
mixture and cook for 5 mins, remove from heat and season with salt and
pepper.
Dough: combine flour, egg and salt with enough tepid water to make a smooth
dough 3mm thick on lightly floured board. Use 7.5cm pastry cutter or glass
to cut dough into rounds. Put 5ml filling in centre of each round, fold
dough rounds into halves and crimp edges with prongs of fork. Put large
saucepan of salted water to boil. Using perforated spoon drop dumplings,
a few at a time into water. When they rise to surface, cook for 4 -5 minutes.
Remove from pan and leave to drain thoroughly.
LONELY HEARTS COLUMN
We understand that Pete Sloman, drug addict and SWP bore is being questioned
by Brighton Police in connection with a stolen car, He was interviewed
in possession of a well known make of Soviet car, and his behaviour is
now becoming something of a habit. At Southport last Conference he was
arrested for being drunk and disorderly and for possession of narcotics.
PS if he wants any dope Clive Martin says he's got plenty.
CREEP OF THE DAY AWARD
Goes to ROGER WILLSON-PEPPER of OPCS London for his forthright seconding
of Motion 12, and we trust he will enjoy himself in Nairobi in1982 at
the PSI. Special awards go to Howling Reg Williams for screeching so well
yesterday and also to Stewart MacLennan for not (yet) raising any points
of order.
NONENTITY CORNER
£5 will be given to the first person to remove John Raywood's toupee
without him noticing. And also, a big CLAP to John Cole of DHSS Glasgow
North (DHSS in-joke.)
STOP PRESS..... Manek Dubash, arrested last night on the picket line outside
the Mayor's Balls, while trying to prevent three burly officers leaving
the function has been awarded PFLCPSA Hero Cadre status.
WEDNESDAY
ALL THE PRESIDENTS MEN
A tense Conference
is eagerly awaiting confirmation today that the peoples' choice, that
triumvirate of just men Graham, Ellis and Raywood will be speedily appointed
to the positions they have earned. Despite the jeers of left wing rabble,
Alistair Graham has shown himself to be a tireless champion of the people.
While his mother ekes out a misererable existence on supplementary benefit
she can take comfort at the lot of number one son whose £18,000
income together with that of his crusading teacher wife will soon be announced.
Raywood, fresh from the triumph of an overwhelming vote of confidence
at P & T Group Conference and Ellis, his I.C.E. victory firmly under
his belt slept soundly in their beds last night. 0ther hands however are
at work. Dynamic Peter Thomason unfortunately has not been able to meet
Conference till now due to his sterling work with his local COCSU committee.
He is of course far too modest to mention this in any way this morning.
The wretched Diana Warwick's feeble attempt to wine and dine the CSEC
Standing Orders Committee in the mistaken belief that they were in fact
the National SOC can only be attributed to her tired and emotional state.
Meanwhile Chief Bald Eagle Ainsworth whose Rock Against Raywood
badges have swamped Conference has won the Brown Tongue of the Year Award
for his consistent toadying at every function he has been able to crash.
POLISH NEWS
Ageing Graham-flunkey Clive Bush, despised Editor of Dead Tape,
has attempted to bribe PFLCPSA supporters with free booze. Needless to
say this was rejected out of hand. Those of you desperate for alcohol
(Alistair Boyd please note) are advised to take the Conference Centre
lift to the third floor, press the special switch to open the door then
proceed to the Interpreters Room where Clive's vast array of spirit is
there for the taking.
CREEP OF THE DAY AWARD
goes to Chris Gasper of DE MSC Essex for his defence of the work experience
programme and the mandate breaking GSEC. Runner up is John Oliver of the
MoD SEC whose rehearsal of his speeches to the assembled ducks at 6 am
in Southport last year, has yet to be surpassed.
DHSS NEWS
George Lobo has been awarded the Hero of the Day Award in a special citation
for unswerving loyalty to Manek Dubash in his hour of need. His well known
public spiritedness and generosity has been extended to an offer to pay
all fines arising out of the forthcoming court case.
THURSDAY
TOP
TABLE WAR FOR G.S. POST
Intense speculation is sweeping Conference as the campaign to elect our
new General begins. Graham and Ellis immediately began their hate campaign
against each other, locked in their bitter battle for this life-time sinecure.
With Graham Banks on the Broad Left to bail him out, he faces ultimate
betrayal by Charlie Elliott, whose splendid manoeuvre will enable his
trusted toady Ellis to win on a Moderate ticket. Elliott has already appointed
himself President-in-waiting, under the nose of the dense Ms. Womersley,
whose tragic eclipse is long overdue.
POLISH AFFAIRS
Meanwhile the Inland Revenue is to be congratulated for declaring honoraria
taxable. We trust that our leaders are also aware that expenses
and other income are equally liable and dutifully declare the appropriate
amounts (John Billouin please note). Mrs. Womersley's boast that she lives
on her expenses and banks her salary doubtless merely reflects her tireless
energy at the service of the people.
CREEP OF THE DAY
This coveted award today goes to Martin IGOE, incoming Chairman of DE
Section, who was spotted in the Madeira Hotel the night before last in
an excessively inebriated state. Speechless and short of cash, he summoned
the barmaid and ordered a round of drinks for which he wouldn't pay. When
the barmaid remarked on this uncomradely behaviour he replied in true
Broad Left fashion by breaking her knuckles.
BRIXTON FUND SCANDAL
In order to ingratiate themselves with conference, the SWP masterminds
behind the Brixton strike have ordered that the £300 residue of
the unofficial strike fund be paid to Fighting Fund. Conference will of
course be fooled by this cynical gesture.
RODDY ELECTION CAMPAIGN CONTINUES
Seen distributing boring Militant leaflets outside Conference
yesterday, Kevin Roddy was reminded by members of the 9th Chapter
Faction that the elections have finished.
DHSS NEWS - POPULAR WILL OF THE MASSES
Peg Mylward, hated Gauleiter of DHSS S. W. Middlesex is in trouble. She
refused to negotiate a new facilities agreement in her branch, saying,
I don't need a facilities agreement - in a few weeks time I'll be
a Section Assistant Secretary (which is of course 100% facility
time). But vanity comes before a fall and Ms Mylward came second from
bottom in the Section poll.
FRIDAY
THOMAS
FOR PRESIDENT!
Ken Thomas's declaration that
he is to stand for President in 1982 if he can pass the CA exam has astounded
all. In an audacious move aimed at enhancing his pension rights, his latest
book `From Militant action to Humble Petition - My Struggle' is now in
its seventh reprint.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch our TATTERSALLS CORRESPONDENT reports that
a shady looking spiv with pockets stuffed with fivers was spied at the
Brighton Races yesterday afternoon, looking remarkably like Charlie Elliot.
His marked card however was not so successful being 1.45 Jane the Joker
2,15 Alangrove Sound 2,45 Edgedale 3.15 Master Bunbury 3.45 Hedingham
Boy 4.15 Never Say When (a non-runner).
While his back was turned however ALISTAIR GRAHAM AND JOHN RAYWOOD plummeted
to new nadirs of cynical opportunism by donating £5.00 and £l0.00
respectively to the `MORNING STAR FIGHTING FUND' an obscure daily which
will cease publication on April 30th 1982. While this desperate attempt
to buy Red votes is doomed, a vicious rumour is circulating that Raywood
is denying his Roman Catholicism.
The KNIGHTS OF ST. COLUMBA will doubtless end this evil smear, bearing
in mind the usual fate for apostates.
INTERNATIONAL YEAR OF THE DISABLED
Those of you who wish to make a real contribution are invited to donate
to the flag seller at Conference, our clear chum Peter Arnott, the DAYLIES
National full-time official, who would only be too happy to talk to anyone
who can recognize or even remember him.
While JOHN FILBY DE LEEDS MSC the aging Yorkshire Stalinist received another
humiliating rebuff from May MacDonald, the belle of the Conservative Party
at the Daylight Ball on Wednesday Night. Filby can be seen asleep in the
observers gallery most afternoons, but as his fiftieth birthday is tomorrow
one cannot be too harsh, It has been noticed that Ian Leadem, also from
the DE Section, has been called into debate more times than any other
DE delegate. This is attributed to his donation of half his expenses to
Dama Losinska in an effort to be nominated for the NEC on any list.
ALL OF US HAVE BEEN pleased and proud to see the concern of the local
-Constabulary in our Conference, This, however, is not due to their just
interest in exotic cheroots, but follows the discovery on Monday of a
plastic bag full of toy coshes found in the vicinity by Julian Losinski,
the famed Daylight artist. Len Lever, showing no interest in the matter,
left it to Julian to report it to his mother, who rightly informed the
forces of law and order, mindful of the Red riff-raff which periodically
fill the cheap seats at Conference. (BLAKE BAKER please note for future
articles - see you in the Popinjay next week). Thanks, Julian, but please
return the coshes to DIANE WARWICK, who has dutifully supplied us with
tons of dirt on her enemies, none of which we have bothered to print.
HERO OF THE WEEK
GOES OF COURSE TO Pat Byrne, DHSS Militant supremo, whose brilliant Kate
Losinska mask operation has had us all in stitches all week, and reflects
the more mature approach being demonstrated by Militant supporters and
readers throughout the world.
CREEP OF THE DAY must go to
Barry Reamsbottom, for daring to presume that we would mention him in
the first place, and the coveted
CREEP OF THE WEEK
has been won by Stuart MacClennan, because he has been so bloody quiet
during debate.
REGARDS to
John Billouin and Marion Chambers, and the best of luck with your Social
Democratic Group, and to all the boys in the LUDOWEGO WOJSKA POLSKIEGO,
without whose help none of this would have been possible. Tough luck,
Peter SLOMAN, for getting expelled from the Socialist Workers Party for
carrying our banner on Thursday's demonstration. This has nothing to do
with the fact that REDDER TAPE ran out of ink half way through printing
one of their boring unreadable leaflets.
And finally, an au revoir to RAY SHUTTLEWORTH, and we will see you again
at the PSI in Singapore, and don't forget to visit the SEAFAYRE fish restaurant,
owned by the Mayor of Brighton, as part of our struggle to keep down the
rates.
PLEASE COMPLETE THE ATTACHED FORM AND RETURN IT TO BATTLE GROUP (LONDON)
-
I fully support the aims and work of the PFLCPSA, and wish to become a
supporter.
NAME
ADDRESS
Tel. no.
BYE BYE CONFERENCE,
SEE YOU NEXT YEAR
ONE STRUGGLE! ONE FIGHT!
The
Daily TELEGRAPH
In all the spectrum of Trotskyist activity, however, no better example
is provided than by the 250,000-strong Civil and Public Services Association,
the middle-grade and largest Civil Service union. A target for all groups,
it faces crucial elections next month (April 16).
The CPS A has long been the battlefield of a vicious fight between moderates,
led by Mrs. Kate Losinska, now challenged by Mr. Kevin Roddy, a Trotskyist
from the Department of Health and Social Security, and the `Broad Left'
alliance of Trotskyists, Communists and fellow-travellers.
Control of the CPSA, representing control of the cogwheels of government,
would be a spanner aimed at the whole machinery of the State, vide the
latest wages strikes. The Broad Left, those uneasy bedfellows, publish
`Redder Tape', counterpart to the official union journal `Red Tape'. Militant
also publishes special issues aimed at CPSA members.
Fair enough, it might be thought, all part of the cut-and-thrust. But
there is a department of dirtier tricks. One document distributed at the
union s recent special pay conference was in the names of Mrs. Losinska
and Mr. Charlie Elliott, Bradford vice president and moderate leader.
It was stated to be a forgery.
Obscene cartoons of Mrs. Losinska have been drawn
and distributed. I have a series of internal bulletins for CPSA members
headed:
`Popular Front for the Liberation of the CPSA (Unified Command Council)',
`Communiqué of the South Midlands Brigade' or `Communiqué
from the Forward Battle Group Valkyrie'. Apart from redolence of Arab
propaganda, they are a weak imitation of satirical publications and under
the guise of thinly disguised pseudonyms, make personal references of
the utmost scurrility to moderate CPSA officials. In the internal CPSA
war, nothing is barred.
One activist is believed to be an Arab supporting the PLO. Last May a
curious incident occurred at the end of the CPSA conference in Southport.
Mrs. Losinska was called by local police to identify three bags apparently
forgotten in the delegates' car park, believed to be union property. On
being opened, they were found by police to contain Arab documents, plastic
guns and much cash. This incident has been discussed at the highest level
in Whitehall.
Nor is this all. Last summer, the CPSA became involved in the stormy dispute
at Brixton Job Centre over sacking of two SWP members. Mr. Ken Thomas,
general secretary, subsequently described the action as a `calculated
and callous exploitation of a trade union issue by a small faction'. He
also maintained that the SWP had almost completely taken over control
of the Brixton dispute, and its activists `bamboozled money out of our
members and branches, trading cheaply on trade union loyalty'. I also
have an SWP national committee document full of doubt and self-criticism
last summer over past and future tactics in the CPSA against moderate
successes.
Recently, the CPSA moderate leadership has discovered that a large number
of its sectional publications, of which I have copies, are being printed
by Cambridge Heath Press, printers and publishers of `Militant'. They
include `Aviation Organiser', `Viewpoint' for the DHSS, `New Environment'
for the Environment Department, `Voice' for the Inland Revenue and `Union
Voice' for the Land Registry.
`Militant' printers are able to tender cheaply for such work because of
cheap or free labour, or employees paying back a tithe on their wages.
But in giving them the work the CPSA is effectively subsidising the Trotskyist
movement.
CPSA members, average age under 30, should, it might be thought, wake
up to the fact that they are being manipulated before next month's elections.
But this union only provides one prime example of subversive Trotskyist
activity through much, if not all, of the British trade union movement.
*********************************************************************************
Subversive? Trotskyist? Wot drugs he on? Ed. Anyway,
the truth about the 3 bags is even stranger.....perhaps one day.....